illusionofjoy | People-watching (Reply)

It may already be Tuesday, but that shan't stop me from describing my weekend with enough disgustingly intricate detail so as to make NPR programmers envious. Overall, it was a weekend of ups and downs, as what happens with so many of my weekends and so much of my life. Let's start with Friday...

I had the night prior to the 4^th off from work, leaving me with the entirety of Friday to myself. Despite being free to do whatever I wanted, I think I still spent the most of it sleeping. The two major highlights of my Independence Day celebration were listening to the Capitol Steps radio special on NPR, and taking a "stupid people" tour on the trolley.

I had opted not to go down to Point State Park to watch the fireworks, nor take the incline up to Mt. Washington to do that same. The thought of being stuck in the centre of a glut of humanity as it collectively "oohed" and "ahhed" just made me feel nauseous. On the other hand, having a monthly transit pass that allowed me unlimited rides, I decided to hop a trolley and take a ride downtown, around the end of the line and then back to Mt. Lebanon just to see what I could see.

What I saw were a bunch of morons masquerading as patriots. If nothing else, this little journey made me feel better about myself, however pretentious that sounds.

The last stop of Pittsburgh's trolley system inbound to downtown, where it loops around and becomes an outbound ride, is Gateway Center. This is located very close to Point State Park, where the festivities were taking place. My ride inbound to Pittsburgh was nice and quiet, with no other people to speak of in the car. As soon as the train stopped at Gateway Center, the train filled to capacity! I had never seen such a spectacular flow of human beings into a mass transit system outside of New York City. It was slightly unsettling and I said a silent prayer of thanks to the gods of transportation that I already had a place to sit.

The first signs of stupidity began as soon as the mass of new passengers started entering the train. Per the balance of the cosmos, the first stupid things said were directed towards me. Two yokels with a 12-year old boy in tow walked up to my aisle. The seat next to me was still empty and the boy was looking at it as if at had spikes affixed to it, rather than a cushion. One of the yokels said to the kid, "go ahead and sit down - he won't bite." Without missing a beat, yokel #2 chimed in with, "I dunno - he looks like the type that would bite. HUHHUHHUH!!!" Being that it is not nice to tease the animals, I held my tongue so as to prevent, "idiocy leaves a foul taste in my mouth" from falling out.

Meanwhile, a plethora of other passengers had decided that it would be a good idea to board the trolley with inflatable toys. Far be it from me to question what exactly the Hulk and Scooby Doo have to do with American Independence, however I will ask this question: is it so hard to deflate these things before boarding a crowded train. I'm certain that these people all thought that a display of these wares would prove what good capitalists - and therefore patriots - they are, easing the worries of the thought police.

The train pulled out of the station. At each subsequent stop the driver would warn passengers to "stand clear of the doors." Apparently deafened by the rocket's red glare and bombs bursting in air, one guy stood right next to the doors at each stop, getting bashed in the head whenever they would open. This was usually followed by a complaint that there was no warning about the doors opening. I was hoping that he'd get knocked out by the time the trolley had reached South Hills Junction (the halfway point to Mt. Lebanon).

Saturday I didn't intend on going idiot-watching on the trolley, but it ended up happening again. starn0star had come to visit me, and we hung out downtown and in South Hills for most of the day. She doesn't have much experience riding Pittsburgh's mass transit system. Since I use a monthly pass, I don't bother thinking about fares, transfers, etc. Suffice it to say that Pittsburgh's mass transit system is set up to confuse, at least when it comes to paying for your ride if you don't have a pass (and even if you do sometimes). I did my best to let my friend know what was happening with the trolley and what she would have to do at the stops.

We arrive at one stop where you have to pay when you exit the train. I show my pass to driver, get off the car and wait for starn0star right outside the doors. She begins to pay for her ride and then realises that she doesn't have exact change. Flustered, she begins too dig into her purse to find some quarters. Not ten seconds after this happens, some yokel starts making comments from behind her - "come on, you're holding us up" and the like.

I walk back into the car, and dig some quarters out of my pocket. As I am doing this, the same yokel chimes in with, "I have places to get to - you're holding me up!" I glare at him and sternly say, "deal with it!" He shuts his gob. Quite frankly, it felt good to put some asshole in their place, though I actually would have liked to see him run over by a trolley, rather than allowed to continue riding one. I guess some people just can't wait to get home to watch Springer and rape their little sister.

Saturday night I went to Ceremony. missjoi was one of the people in the booth, which meant that I could be guaranteed a fair share of music I enjoyed, Placebo and...ABBA? Indeed, she played ABBA - "Dancing Queen," to be specific, which I gleefully twirled to, probably because I enjoy making people question my sexual orientation. I also got my hands on a promo copy of the Razed In Black disc, courteousy of the aforemented DJ inclined to playing 70s pop tunes in the middle of Goth night.

Overall, the music was really good at Ceremony last Saturday. I could tell than the DJs were just on all night long. The only problem was that, though I wanted to keep dancing, the heat in the club prevented such a thing. I'd go for about four songs and then end up running for the water pitchers so I could cool down. I was certain that I'd end up as a puddle on the floor before the night was out, and I have discovered that it is just no fun whatsoever to have one's makeup run into one's eyes. They do test this shit on rabbits, right? I mean, rabbits need to be beautiful too, right?

So, now the weekend is over and I'm back to the drudgery of my normal life. Just last night I was ready for it to be Friday again already. Still, work pays the bills and the bills need to be paid. I just wish I could get paid to play. It would be nice...

I think I'll go home now and make myself some macaroni and cheese before I have to go to work. END TRANS