illusionofjoy | Why I went to Northern New York and why I left (Reply)

On the morning of Friday, September 19^th, I caught a bus from downtown Pittsburgh to missjoi's apartment. I had packed my duffel bag the previous night and it was residing at her place in order to expediate the process of leaving Pittsburgh for Watertown, New York that evening. Instead of my apartment, I would spend the day sleeping at Joi's place while she went to work.

That morning Joi had come down with the current "Pittsburgh plague" - a severe cold that has been going around the area. It had been raining on and off all night into the morning and Joi had me drive her to work, telling me that she did not feel like standing in the rain in order to catch a bus. She handed me her keys, told me that she'd ring the doorbell so I could let her in when she got home and I drove her downtown.

Upon returning to the apartment, I pretty much went straight to bed. I slept fairly well, only waking up once throughout the course of the day. My dreams were bizarre, however. For some reason I was attending a college math course in a classroom that could only be accessed by going through the sewer. While I was in the class, someone kept mocking the professor, much to my quiet amusement. The only other thing I can remember about the dream was driving to the class on a rocket-propelled go-kart, only to see ET in front of me (yes, that ET, from the Steven Spielberg movie of the same name). That glimpse was quickly followed by me falling off the go-kart as it mowed down ET, catching him in such a way that he and the go-kart became pinned, cartoon-like, to the wall. Following this chain of events, ET stood up, raised his right arm, gave the Satan sign and started head banging. I woke up, laughing my ass off.

There was no way for me to get to sleep after seeing the images I'd just seen, so I opted to take a shower. It was about quarter to 5:00 at that point, so that was probably the best idea. I had just dried off when the doorbell rang. Quickly throwing on my robe and slippers, I let Joi into her apartment.

It wasn't long afterwards that we were off to pick up masochistmonkey and his boyfriend. We called them up before leaving Joi's apartment and they were ready to go when we got to their place. Their bags were packed in the truck, they were packed into the back seat and the journey to Watertown began.

The drive up wasn't that bad. As expected, the traffic was at its worst in Pennsylvania, right outside of Pittsburgh. Along the corridor of I-279 and I-79 just north of the city, people drive like complete maniacs. There are far too many hills and tight curves to be going 80MPH, yet people do it anyhow. Also, as expected, the roads became much improved once the state line into New York was crossed.

We arrived in Watertown early Saturday morning - about 2:00AM, making better time than we had expected. Masochistmonkey and his boyfriend were to stay at the parent's house of the bride for the duration of our stay, while Joi and I had reserved a hotel room. After dropping off the boys, we crashed for the night.

It was sunny the day of the wedding ceremony, with a cool breeze blowing through the air. It was a brief service; very sincere yet to the point. It was held at All Souls Unitarian Church, a religious establishment that is very progressive, especially for Watertown. After the ceremony, while waiting for the reception to begin, I read the church's mission statement as posted in the lobby. To surmise, the goal of this church is to bring together all peoples and faiths under one roof, each to pursue spirituality in their own way without fear of ridicule or rejection. Indeed that such an institution existed in such a rural area was unusual, to say the least.

The reception, like the ceremony, was brief as well. I had a chance to speak with some people whom I had known in college, but hadn't seen for a couple of years at that point. Once couple, whose wedding reception I had DJed (in fact, this was the first wedding I had been to where I wasn't DJing at the reception), were talking about how they had been living in Watertown since they'd gotten married. I was telling them about Pittsburgh, and they were apparently impressed enough that they said they would check it out, looking like they genuinely meant it. I find this amusing, since my friends who had just gotten married were planning on moving to Pittsburgh after their honeymoon. Not only that, but they were in the process of convincing some of their friends to move there as well. It would seem that Pittsburgh is Mecca to the refugees of Northern New York. Before myself and Masochistmonkey, three of his friends had already moved here.

It was 2:00 in the afternoon by the time the reception started winding down. There was a party happening back at the house afterwards, scheduled to last well into the night. Joi and I opted to go later in the evening, as we had time for a visit to Potsdam. Being only an hour away from Watertown, I figured that a quick "hello" to my family wouldn't be too out of the way. I also wanted to prove to Joi once and for all that where I grew up was worse than where she grew up. After going there, she had no other choice but to agree with me.

My family seems to be doing well, aside from my younger brother's insane notion that he'll be able to move to New York City without it eating him alive. I told him point blank that he could not afford New York City, which was why I didn't move there. I'm not sure that he believed me.

Overall, Potsdam is shocking in how little anything in the village has changed. Joi and I went to Strawberry Fields and I saw the same people working there who had always worded there, mingled with the same people who had always hung out there. I was immediately recognised, coupled with a perplexing gaze that asked, "where have you been all this time?"

It was in the record store that I told WAIH is effectively dead. In fact, when I tried tuning it in on the radio in Joi's car, all I got was static. Friends online had informed me of its decline, but someone on staff let me know that it was finally belly-up. While it makes me sad to know that the dream is over and my vision was effectively wasted on SUNY Potsdam's college radio station, I was also overcome with a sadistic sense of glee that all along, I had been the only one there who knew what the hell was going on and what the hell I was doing.

Joi and I bid farewell to Potsdam, returning to Watertown to spend some time with the newlyweds, and our travelling companions from Pittsburgh. By the time we got there, the party had pretty much wound down. We ended up watching Six String Samurai, a surrealist apocalyptic rock n' roll fantasy, following which, we went back to our hotel room.

The following morning we began the journey back to Pittsburgh. The sun was shining brightly and I was wishing that I could be driving back at night, like I had driven up. These wishes were only fortified when the trip back wasn't as immune from incidents as the trip up.

Aside from dealing with general morons on the road, we got pulled over on the Thruway. In hindsight, we knew that it was a targeted speed trap. I was driving at the same speed as everyone else, my only sin being that I was driving a car with a Pennsylvania state license plate on a New York state highway while being unable to see the state trooper vehicle hidden on the other side of the bridge pier. Once we had passed by the car he pulled out onto the road right behind us. We knew it was all over before he even turned on his lights and I pulled over as soon as the flashing began.

While I hate kissing the asses of the people on the lowest rung of the legal ladder, I am also aware that one gets nowhere by being discourteous to police officers. Comparatively, this stop was not very harrowing, though any hopes for being let off with a warning evaporated when I was handed the ticket.

I'm certain that the officer felt he'd caught a nice big juicy one for his required ticket quota (and don't bother spinning any yarns trying to tell me that they don't have quotas). Here were four residents of Pittsburgh, a city in south western Pennsylvania, caught speeding in the Finger Lakes region of New York. That alone is a five-hour drive, a distance most are loathe to take just for traffic court. While I could make an appearance, I really have neither the time nor money to do so (not that I have the money to pay a speeding ticket - or, more accurately, want to use my money to pay a speeding ticket), so I'll plead guilty by mail, pay the fine and get on with my life.

Still, it does nothing to aid my perception that there is no justice in these United States when, while sitting at the side of the highway waiting for the officer to fill out his paperwork, the cars passing us on the highway were going at such speeds that our vehicle shook every time one zoomed by. When the officer told us we could go, we pulled out only to be nearly side-swiped by a pickup truck that must have been going 90MPH. In the event that we had been hit, at least an officer would have been right there. I would have seriously considered asking him to rescind the speeding ticket.

We all got home around 9:00PM, happy to see a bunch of tall buildings and suburban sprawl, rather than acres of farmland and unlit roads. Having called off from work that night, I got into bed and passed out once I was back in my apartment.