Link: Portrait of an Open Marriage

With very few exceptions, human beings are sexual creatures. From the onset of puberty until death, the hormones flow and one becomes forever locked in the pursuit of how to get laid. The radical religious right would have us believe that the denial of sexuality is a virtue and that traditional monogamous heterosexual marriage is the solution to the "problem." I suppose that for some this is true; married monogamy and happiness go hand in hand. However, for every allegedly straight-laced type who is actually happy with said arrangement, I'm willing to bet that there are a dozen others out there who are downright lying when they say the same thing.

To the truthful end of the spectrum, freelance writer Jenny Block has written an essay about her open marriage, published in Tango. It is daring to make such a confession in a day and age where religious extremists would force the genie of sexual liberation back into the bottle of repression. However, Block's point of view isn't so much radical as it is practical. She isn't really saying anything too terribly different from what sex columnist Dan Savage has been saying for years; to paraphrase: "an affair is a survivable and sometimes necessary part of a relationship." An except from Block's essay:

It’s been interesting and hard and wonderful and confusing. It has led to some terribly sad moments and some incredibly joyful ones. The sad ones always stem from some combination of ego, insecurity, and lack of communication. The wonderful ones result from love and trust and understanding. But really, it’s blindingly simple. We give each other what we need, including freedom and space. We respect one another. And we are self-aware enough to know that we’re interested in, and capable of, exploring sex, whatever that means for us and despite what it may mean for anyone else. (That is, of course, anyone not sexually involved with us.) It has brought my husband and me closer than I ever imagined possible.

If only common sense prevailed and more people would own up to some simple truths...